Conundrum

How can you enjoy someone's company so much and yet have resentment and animosity towards them? It's a conundrum.

I had a really nice weekend. I went to a company party, begrudgedly, with my boyfriend completely expecting to have a terrible time. I was surprised, however, and really enjoyed myself. We gambled with funny money and it was just an all around good time.

The following day we took some really nice Christmas pictures with the baby. We did the cute wearing matching outfits (we more blended then wore the exact same thing) and went to a professional place and got the pictures taken. We'll use one for our Christmas cards this year. It felt like we were a family and it was nice.......until we got to the register of course. Some people just don't know how to act in public.

Now I just don't understand why I feel the way I feel sometimes. It's a conundrum.

Why is it...

Why is it that we always hurt the ones we love? I know it's a little cliche but it's so true. We say me and hurtful things and once those words are out, you can't take them back. It makes for a bad life and bad relationships.

Why is it that we feel we need to stay in a relationship that causes us pain and misery?Relationships whether they be with friends, family, boyfriends, girlfriends or whoever should bring us joy or at the very least some sort of satisfaction or fulfillment; when they stop doing that it's probably time to just end it.

Why is it that we are so apprehensive about ending something that doesn't work anymore? Relationships end. People change. Feelings change. It's life, it happens. It doesn't mean you haven't tried everything you could to make things work. It doesn't mean you are a bad person. It just is what it is, and sometimes that means it's over.

Why is it that we can't manage to stay friends with someone after a relationship is over? Is it really always all or nothing? What happens when there are children involved? Who really suffers most?