I am a new mother and trying to find my way to what life is now. Motherhood changes EVERYTHING. I find it to be extremely rewarding and fulfilling. However, that being said, it's hard to find my new normal.
Normal used to be doing what I wanted when I wanted to. Spending what I wanted, eating what I wanted, sleeping when I wanted, that has all changed. I know it seems like my life was pretty selfish pre-baby but that really isn't so. I was just a typical unmarried 20-something (yea I am a 30-something now). My boyfriend and I liked to do whatever, whenever. Since the baby arrived our priorities have shifted and I kind of like it. My baby was premature so the change hit me hard and early and made me realize I needed to grow up and begin being the parent I always envisioned I would be. It's been a struggle as I worked through insecurities and feelings of inadequacy early on. I am sure this is not new to new moms but it was very difficult for me.
Now that my son is home and healthy and growing rapidly, I struggle to find my new normal. I went out Friday night with the girls for the first time since becoming pregnant and having a baby. I had tons of fun and drank too much and quickly realized, I can't party like I used to. Lucky for me, the boyfriend stepped up and cared for our boy so I could have my night. I did, however, have to put on my mommy hat early Saturday morning, hangover and all. That is what motherhood is about. Baby doesn't care if you are sick or tired or hung over, he needs you so you better be there!
So is this my new normal? Life with my son with glimpses or my old normal thrown in from time to time? I guess that is OKwith me.